I wish I'd been drinking something when I read this - it would have made for a great coke-nose-spray story. However, I'm glad that I emptied my bladder. Spraying coke is one thing, pissing all over yourself and the carpet. As you know, I am bound by the code we hold most precious. You know, the one that gets you into the least trouble.
-pause for laughter-
No, just like you, my brothers (sisters represent!) in assinisisity, I would have been, on pain of eternal banishment from public mens (sisters represent!) rooms, and subject of lots of narky commentary in various media outlets.
IF I HAD NOT fessed up to at least one version of the coke-nose-spray story, preferably the one with the grossest bodily functions.
Right, it's not "preferably", its THE LAW - so, you, loyal listeners have to decide:
a) Am I, as I stated at the beginning of the email, merely wishing I had that sort of story to tell.
b) In a slightly odder (and a bit more machiavellian in its execution), am I simply concealing a coca-cola nose-spew of epic proportions? If so, why?
c) Most devious yet... Did I actually piss myself, and have I been sitting here *all* *this* *time* InAPuddleofPiss?
d) All of the above
e) None of the above
Please pass your papers to the front of the class, the nurse will be by with your medication, and do try to have a quiet night's sleep.
3 Comments:
I wish I'd been drinking something when I read this - it would have made for a great coke-nose-spray story. However, I'm glad that I emptied my bladder. Spraying coke is one thing, pissing all over yourself and the carpet. As you know, I am bound by the code we hold most precious. You know, the one that gets you into the least trouble.
-pause for laughter-
No, just like you, my brothers (sisters represent!) in assinisisity, I would have been, on pain of eternal banishment from public mens (sisters represent!) rooms, and subject of lots of narky commentary in various media outlets.
IF I HAD NOT fessed up to at least one version of the coke-nose-spray story, preferably the one with the grossest bodily functions.
Right, it's not "preferably", its THE LAW - so, you, loyal listeners have to decide:
a) Am I, as I stated at the beginning of the email, merely wishing I had that sort of story to tell.
b) In a slightly odder (and a bit more machiavellian in its execution), am I simply concealing a coca-cola nose-spew of epic proportions? If so, why?
c) Most devious yet... Did I actually piss myself, and have I been sitting here *all* *this* *time* InAPuddleofPiss?
d) All of the above
e) None of the above
Please pass your papers to the front of the class, the nurse will be by with your medication, and do try to have a quiet night's sleep.
Do try.
f) The Magna Carta
I like cheese fries.
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